It’s really interesting checking out this page every couple of years, and seeing the ways my perspective has changed. Before the About page was very much a declaration of who I am. Nowadays I’m much less interested in defining ‘who I am’ as I am in understanding ‘why I’m here.’
So here it is, what Cam’s About, circa mid-2019.
As a generation we’re really good at celebrating ourselves, and giving ourselves grace, and putting on a façade of perfect life filled with travel and turn ups and jobs we love or conspicuously absent jobs we hate. And we don’t talk about how hard the shit is. Life, being the shit. We don’t give ourselves a space to document our uncertainties and our endings and our failures. We talk about mental illness, possibly more than any generation preceding ours, and I’m so glad that we do. But the daily grind of existence—uncertainty, doubt, existential anguish—doesn’t get much play.
Am I dating the right person? Is this job something I’m ok with doing forever? Do I like the friends I have or are we friends at this point out of proximity and convenience? Am I traveling because I like to travel or to get away from the other 85% of my life? Is God something I’m still comfortable believing in? We don’t talk about it, at least not on a platform where other people can benefit from the shared knowledge and discussion. So this is what this blog aims to do—document the experience. I don’t know if it’s right for everyone. I don’t even know if it’s right for me. But I think figuring that out is a big part of…well…everything.
“None of us understand what we’re doing, but we do beautiful things anyway.”Allen Ginsberg